Mediation Helps Couples Successfully Untangle Their Lives
{1:42 minutes to read} “Never cut what you can untie.” Joseph Joubert, French essayist This aphorism came to my attention recently when one of my colleagues was giving a presentation at our annual conference for the NYS Council on Divorce Mediation. I was immediately struck by the wisdom contained in its 6 simple words.
Divorce Financial Considerations with a Special Needs Child
{4:18 minutes to read} In my last blog, I discussed the governmental benefits that are available to a child or young adult with special needs. When I meet with my couples in divorce mediation, I need to first make sure they understand the public benefits their child is entitled to and then also discuss how these benefits relate to the many expenses (some covered by governmental benefits, some not) that arise when parents are raising a special needs child.
Governmental Benefits and the Special Needs Child
{2:48 minutes to read} In my next blog I will be discussing the various financial issues that affect the parents of a special needs child who are divorcing. Before doing that, however, I first need to describe the basic framework of governmental services and benefits that are provided to children and young adults with disabilities.
Parenting Arrangements for Special Needs Children
{3:32 minutes to read} When I’m mediating with parents who have a special needs child, I view myself as being on a “fact finding mission.” What do I mean by that? In addition to performing my other mediator responsibilities, my role is to gather as much information as I can about the couple’s special needs child, and how that child’s disability relates to each of the parents’ lives, as well as to any other siblings in the family. Clearly, these family relationships are often more complex than families without a special needs child.
Special Needs Children and Parenting Discussions
{3:06 minutes to read} When couples with normal-developing kids are separating or divorcing, we can spend quite a bit of time during mediation discussing their parenting arrangements. Among the many subjects that need to be addressed are: what the weekday and weekend parenting schedule will look like; how scheduling for holidays and summer vacations will be handled; and in what ways the scheduling may need to reflect the specific work circumstances of the parents.
Divorcing Parents and Their Special Needs Children
{3:12 minutes to read} I just finished a mediation session with a divorcing couple who have a special needs child, in addition to two typically-developing children. While divorces involving special needs children are often complicated and involve more issues than the “normal” divorce, I find helping these families to be especially rewarding.
Children and Divorce – Why Mediation is Better
{3:36 minutes to read} Last week, I heard Dr. Robert Emery speak at a symposium on parenting and divorce sponsored by FamilyKind, the NY Chapter of AFCC and Hofstra University School of Law. I was so pleased to have the opportunity to hear about his insightful and continuing work with divorcing families and their children.
What are the 4 Elements of Divorce?
{3:30 minutes to read} When most people are going through a divorce they don’t think about the various elements that come into play during this difficult process. They are often overwhelmed with emotions (anger, resentment and sadness, among them) that come up during this extremely difficult time of their lives.
Untangling Lives: The Divorce Mediation Process
{3:48 minutes to read} Divorce mediation, as opposed to a contested divorce (in which each spouse hires an attorney and fights it out through the court system), is often a better choice for couples. When a couple decides to divorce, they need to begin the process of “disentangling” from each other. They can either approach this task in a humane and constructive way (which mediation supports), or they can let it degenerate into increased anger and animosity (which litigation often results in).
Helping Parents Raise Well-Adjusted Children
{3:12 minutes to read} The NY Times published a recent opinion, entitled “To Help Kids Thrive, Coach Their Parents,” which I found especially interesting. The author, Paul Tough, referenced a number of studies that have been conducted over the years with respect to children’s development and well-being, demonstrating the positive role that coaching for parents can have in their children’s development.
