Category Archives: Conflict

Why Isn’t Divorce Mediation More Popular?

Why Isn’t Divorce Mediation More Popular?

{3:54 minutes to read}  I believe that divorce mediation should be the first choice for the majority of couples who are separating or divorcing. So then, why isn’t the divorce mediation process used more frequently by couples?

I’ve been pondering this question for a number of years now. My role as chair of the Public Awareness Committee of our statewide NY State Council on Divorce Mediation has helped inform me on this subject, as our organization has tried to bridge the knowledge gap for divorcing couples.

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What’s So Special About a Roundabout?

{3:02 minutes to read}  My mind has been focused on “roundabouts” for the past several weeks. This might sound strange, but there’s really a good reason for it. First of all, I happened upon an intriguing article in the NY Times about a month ago on the increasing use of roundabouts in the U.S. And then, over the past two weeks I’ve been vacationing in Europe, which is the ‘birthplace’ of the modern roundabout. So I’ve had an opportunity to see and enjoy many of these engineering designs up-close during my travels.

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The Children’s Bill of Rights

The Children’s Bill of Rights By Susan Ingram

{3:42 minutes to read}  Many of the couples I see in my divorce mediation practice have children. Not surprisingly, I find that some parents are more able than others to keep their conflict separate from their relationship with the children. Understandably, this is no small feat, given all of the emotions, anxieties and fears that can arise during this challenging transition from married to separated/divorced.

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Can Conflict Be Good?

Can Conflict Be Good

{3.06 minutes to read}  Many people, when in conflict, see it as something bad and unsettling and, indeed, it can be.  Alternatively, conflict can often be good. How can this be so?

There are 2 sides to conflict – one is productive and the other is unproductive. As to which of these approaches will prevail, that very much depends upon the attitude and approach of the participants.

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Hitting the Pause Button in Divorce Mediation

{3 minutes to read}  Most divorce mediations can be resolved within a matter of months. By ‘resolved’ I mean that, within that timeframe, the couple will have:

  • participated in a number of sessions to discuss their issues,
  • come to an understanding on these issues, and
  • reviewed and executed a legal document (a settlement agreement) that sets out everything they’ve agreed upon.

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My Top 9 Picks for Choosing Divorce Mediation

Divorce and family mediator, Susan Ingram, shares her 9 top reasons she chooses divorce mediation over litigation.

{Time to Read: 3 3/4 minutes}  There are many reasons for a couple to choose to mediate their divorce. Here are My Top 9 Picks (in no particular order):

1. Expense: Mediation is much less costly than litigation. With mediation, the parties are paying just one professional – the mediator – to facilitate the process. In litigation, both parties have to pay the fees of each of their own attorneys as well as many additional fees and costs that are directly related to the litigation process.

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Welcoming 2015 with a 10-Year Look-Back

Family and divorce mediator, Susan Ingram, reflects on her professional journey of the last 10 years as the new year approaches.

{Time to Read: 3.1 mins}  Typically, at the end of each December, before the entrance of the New Year, I like to look back at what’s happened over the past year and then contemplate what I’d like to accomplish in the year that is coming. This year I decided to do my review a little differently. Instead of just looking at the timeframe of a year, I wanted to see the big-picture over the period of the past 10 years.

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Divorcing Couples and Parenting Plans

Divorce and family mediator, Susan Ingram, discusses divorcing parents and parenting plans.

For couples who have children and are divorcing, there’s no more important subject to discuss than their parenting arrangements post-divorce.

As we are working in mediation, my couples sometimes ask if there is a best parenting plan that couples should adopt and follow. The short answer to that question is, no. The slightly longer answer is – no, because so much depends on the unique circumstances and needs of your specific family and its members.

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