Decision-making is an important aspect of divorce mediation. In mediation, your mediator supports and guides you in your discussions as the two of you make all of the decisions related to your divorce. This is preferable to what happens in a litigated divorce, in which the judge and your separate attorneys are the ones who make the decisions.
Though email has become an integral part of life, there are situations where using email is not appropriate. It works fine for many simple exchanges of information, but not for the substantive and more emotionally charged conversations that happen during divorce mediation. This video explains why.
In this video, I share a simple tip that can significantly change the focus of your conversations and make them more productive. It has to do with the word “and.” By consciously choosing when and how you include “and” in your conversations, you can go from frustrating exchanges that don’t get anywhere to discussions that explore options and come up with viable solutions.
The way in which we listen to others in our conversations with them is extremely important. We can choose Active Listening, which will bring us closer to true dialogue and understanding, Or we can choose Internal Listening, which will not further the dialogue or lead to resolution of the differences between people.
When couples with normal-developing kids are separating or divorcing, we can spend quite a bit of time during mediation discussing their parenting arrangements. When the couple has a special needs child, the whole landscape changes. The discussions about parenting need to be much more detailed so as to flesh out the realities of their situation.
When couples divorce, they need to resolve important issues related to the ending of their marriage, such as dividing their assets and determining what their parenting arrangements will be. When a couple proceeds with divorce mediation, they’ve chosen to make these decisions on their own, with the help of the mediator. This is referred to as an uncontested divorce.
A basic requirement of divorce mediation is that the mediator be neutral and impartial. At the same time, the mediator must be attentive to any power imbalances that exist between the parties. Even though a neutral, the mediator will support the person with less power or knowledge so that he or she can participate fully…
Rarely when I see a couple for our first mediation session do I find they’re “on the same page” regarding the end of their marriage. Often one spouse is ahead of the other in contemplating the prospect of divorce. See how this disparity plays out in the mediation process.